Okcupid How Long Before You Can Message Someone Again

This is really one of the worst feelings in all of online dating. You've plant that amazing person and yous spend all afternoon crafting the perfect message to ship to them. And and so yous await…and you wait…until you outset to realize that they might not be writing you back. Should you send a second message? Well, this is the one thousand thousand dollar question that we're going to embrace today.

guy pointing at his smart phone

The Respond

Aye. If you lot've read any of our blogs, you know that most of our answers come with conditions, simply this one is pretty lucent. Y'all can and should ship a second bulletin if y'all want to. A lot of times letters will become buried in online dating particularly if you're messaging a female (females typically get fashion more than messages than men). Sometimes, people volition just go through and clean everything out or will practise a quick scan through deleting things and might accidentally delete your message.

But, how can you know if this is the case or if they're just not interested? The answer is that you can't. You'll take no way of knowing if they are just not interested, forgot to respond, or accidentally deleted your message.

That beingness said, why non err on the side of caution and ship a second message? What's the worst that tin can happen? The worst that can happen is they just delete information technology again or send you a message telling you they aren't interested. Is that really that bad?

Nosotros don't call up so and you shouldn't either. If yous're likewise sensitive to take an I'm not interested alphabetic character from someone, then y'all need to take a break from dating for a while. But, most people are only going to delete your bulletin again if they deleted the first one and motion on so you really don't need to worry about that.

The all-time that tin happen is they run into your message and are interested! That's an opportunity you'd never have gotten if you didn't send that 2d message. The only way y'all're going to put your mind to rest on whether you should send that second message or non is to ship that second bulletin.

The Grab

We know nosotros said in that location was no take hold of, but there is a little i. You need to brand sure that y'all aren't sending the 2nd message besides soon. If it's been 3 hours and you haven't heard from them, don't send a 2d message.

Seriously…give them some fourth dimension to get online and read through their messages and get dorsum to you. Ideally, we recommend waiting at least eight days before sending your second message. Some people only check their accounts one solar day a week, and this will ensure that they have a take chances to read your message and respond if they want to.

Secondly, make certain that your second bulletin is non rude or calling them out for non responding. Yous tin can say something to the upshot of "Hey! Just wanted to see if you were effectually to chat. Sorry for the second message, but yous seem really cool, and I'd kick myself if I didn't try to reach out once again. Annihilation to that effect would be perfect. Please don't ship "Hey, why are yous ignoring me?" or Anything like that, please. Imagine how well that would go over if they just hadn't gotten a chance to read your offset message. You'd at present shot yourself in the foot.

Read Receipts

The one exception to this is when you use an online dating site with read receipts. This is a part that tells you when and if someone read your message. On a lot of sites, it will besides tell you if they just deleted your bulletin. This is a feature that we highly recommend getting if it'due south available. It tin assist to put a lot of your concerns to residuum and prevent you lot from sending a second message if they oasis't read your first one yet.

Read: Understanding How Read Receipts Work


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Picture of writer Christina Anne

Written By: Christina Anne

Christina Anne is a proud dog mom and a highly regarded powerhouse within the writing customs. Christina enjoys crafting manufactures about dating, relationships, love, and matrimony. Her mantra is "truth be told," then expect to get a dose of reality and tough dear in every commodity she writes.

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Source: https://healthyframework.com/dating/blog/should-you-send-a-second-message-online-dating/

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